Saturday, October 23, 2010

Bloody details...

This post is a themed writing project challenge taken from Jenny Matlock over at off on my tangent.

Jenny says we can use UP to 100 words to tell our story. It can be fact or fiction. Jenny posts a few words, a prompt that we work from. This weeks prompt is in bold itallics.

They’d waited weeks to hear the story of a survivor, first hand.

They listened, huddled at the lunch table, so close their heads almost touching as Barbara Osborn shared details of her accident.

“Blood EVERYWHERE” Barbara whispered, looking from girl to girl.

“More blood than anyone should ever have to see”

At seventeen, they knew better than to follow Barbara’s example.

She’d been warned too, but liked to do things her own way.

They all knew the accident was bound to happen sooner or later.

"This is the scariest story I've ever heard..."  

Dee Dee Flynn responded to Barbara’s finishing detail...

“Giving birth was like shitting a watermelon”.


  1. This is a twist on a scary story...interesting take....ending took me by surprise.

  2. wow sounds like my mother :/ she was always scared of us doing something like that but it also reminded me of a movie I watched last night, called Legion. The girls baby was supposed to save the world .

  3. Ha! I love this one! I can actually relate, too! Nice twist at the end.

  4. Excellent twist at the end! You did a great job of making me assume it was going to be a drinking and driving moral to the story but not only did the twist surprise me, it did indeed scare me with the Watermelon reference!

    Kudos on a job very well done.

  5. The ending definitely took me by surprise. I could tell one was coming, but not THAT one!

    Good twist.


  6. OMG, what an ending. Hopefully, those other girls learned a lesson lol.

  7. Hahaha! Giving birth was definitely scary the first time around. Good take on the prompt!

  8. OOOOH Amen sister!!That was a very excellent use of the prompt and I concur with your description of giving birth! :D ~Ames

  9. LOL - I loved it! A funny and unique take on the prompt. :-)

    My Saturday Centus

  10. Your little story will do more to prevent teen pregnancy than anything I've read!

  11. That was one of the funniest twists I've read in a lonnnnnnnnng time. I'm howling with laughter!!

  12. This caught me completely off guard - I was expecting a tale of texting and driving. Great use of the prompt, and that last line made me laugh out loud. Better than a thousand teachers telling kids not to have unprotected sex! Kat

  13. A well written story with a great twist of a moral! This should be made into a PSA.


  14. They could make a contraception ad only using a picture depicting your last just could work!

  15. haha the end sentrance was a classic!

    Tina from Mummy Diaries

  16. This was very intriguing and unpredictable. I really like it.

  17. oh man, that is NOT what I expected. WOW. Well done!

  18. Kids raising kids. Absolutely terrifying and yet the beat goes on.

  19. Great job! The last line was perfect! Awesome take on the prompt!

  20. Cleverly written! I was not expecting this.

    Just some thoughts about one of a woman's hardest balancing acts:

    I think that having children, I mean, giving birth to a baby, is something that you need to be mature enough to handle. But, on the other hand, you can scare a girl to the point where she waits too long and never has any children. (Thirty-five-year-olds remembering stories they heard in their teens.) Giving birth to a child is something that younger women do better that older.

    Yes, this is a dilemma.

    I think there is something about the stories that women tell other women (or girls telling other girls) about giving birth, that is similar to the kind of horror stories that guys tell other guys about being in the army: The bloodier, the better.

    I would like to remind all of these girls who are frightened by these stories about giving birth, that there is alot that can be done to make childbirth easier for both the mother and her child. There are different kinds of pain-blocking methods, there are planned C-sections, and if you are young and healthy, you can do it by the strength of your young body. We are not living in the dark ages.

    But on the other hand, having a child, giving birth to a child, marks the end of one's own childhood; and I don't wish it on teenaged girls. They are not yet fully grown. They are not ready for it.

    How to find a good balance?

    Thought-provoking SC-post. Well done!
    Best wishes,
    Anna's & Sara's SC-post Week 25

  21. Thank you ALL so much for all of the comments...this was a true story from my own life. As a 17 year old beauty school student who listened to her classmate tell of the horrors of giving birth it was a good thing for us to hear at the time. None of us was ready for motherhood. I went on to birth three children, medicine free....not a bragging story, but to just to say that while the story frightened me terribly as a teen, I didn't give it too much thought as a 26 yr old...I figured women have been doing this for eons and some of them even do it more than once... ;-)

  22. OK, yea. Childbirth was definitely one of the scarier stories of my life.

    Second perhaps only to attempting to raise teenagers!

    You really surprised me here. The ending was such a twist.

    Definitely a TREAT for a BOO-tiful Halloween afternoon read!


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