Don't tell me where to go......

The first words out of Daddio's mouth this morning were "What day is it?"

When I told him Tuesday he said "Um....we forgot to get your work van".

That translates to Daddio being my chauffeur this morning...never a great thing without some advance planning.

You see I drive Daddio totally nuts...when he's driving (and if truth be told, most other times too ).

My unorganized self will ask him to pull back into the driveway one, two, maybe even three times before we can get on the road and on our way.

"Just watching you try to leave makes me tired"  crabby Daddio complained.

I had a lot to take to work today and that usually spells big trouble and room for errors.

He'd already filled the back of the car with four flats of tomato and pepper plants that I babysat over the long holiday weekend.

Daddio was aggravated with me when I handed him more than an arms load of bags, a box, a laundry basket and a small baggie filled with Corn Flakes complete with instructions not to crush the cereal.

When he was fully loaded like a pack mule he asked me to hand him the car keys.....

GULP!!! "The car keys???" I ask, a bit confused.

Quickly I do a mental inventory..keys? Did he give me the keys? Omg!!! He gave me the keys!!! Where are the keys? What did I do with the keys? Wait...I don't remember him handing me any keys.

"I don't have the keys" I say "You didn't give me any keys" I insist.

"They're in your hand" Daddio nods toward the keys dangling from the bottom of my palm.

On the road I make lots of small talk...which to a guy like Daddio sounds like nails on a chalkboard.

Or Charley Brown's teacher's wawawawawawawaw."

As soon as I notice his eyes beginning to cross and bug out I quiet down.

After we've pulled around back at my workplace to drop off the plants and we get back into the car I assume Daddio is turning around which will put him going the wrong way to head toward the other parking lot where my van is waiting.

"No!!! Don't go that way" I say "go this way" pointing to a small pothole filled gravel road.

"I'm trying to avoid the potholes...I know which way to go! Don't tell me where to go. You don't need to tell me where to go."

"Okay so maybe I don't need to tell you WHERE to go" I say " But I really really want to tell you WHERE TO GO!!!!

"You want to know where you can go?" I ask.

I begin searching my purse looking for the key to the work van.

My purse looks like an active volcano.

"I can't find my key" I say "I know I saw it somewhere."

"Probably on the kitchen counter" Daddio says, sighing.

As I'm digging a tunnel to the bottom of my purse things are falling out of the sides and onto the floor of the car.

"Man...it must suck to be you" Daddio says "you are very unorganized".

"Yeah it does suck to be me." I say with a growl.

"IT REALLY SUCKS TO BE ME" I say even louder.

Finally I locate the key and Daddio pulled up to the van, stopped and said "get the hell out".

"Good riddance" I said back as I closed the door.

He circled back around and rolled down the window....

"Come home in a better mood" he yelled.

(Which almost made me pee my pants)

I blew him a kiss and headed into work.