Friday, December 30, 2011

The Dutchess of Notadamnthing shares a Royal Review....

Daddio and I were spoiled rotten by our children this Christmas.

They gifted us with their presence and with a shit load of presents... it was awesome (and a bit embarrassing)...

I mean when the kids each get a couple of gifts and Daddio and I are nearly buried alive in packages..on a level or two it didn't feel right..

ohhh, eff dat crap, it felt utterly amazing.

Since becoming a Mrs. Goog has been telling me about the finer things in life, like really expensive sheets.

I feel about sheets like I feel about wrapping paper... total waste of flow.

Like a plastic store sack that is good enough to carry your cans and a loaf of bread so is a utility cotton cover for your mattress.

Daddio and I inherited some standard sized sheets (and some mismatched pillow cases) from Marmie when she moved.

And then at some point we were forced to purchase a set or two to go on our waterbed when we turned cool and bought one.

(Three pregnancies sleeping on a water bed, both a blessing and a curse... easy to sleep on my stomach, impossible to get out of)...

speaking of impossible to get out of, that king sized water bed was continually being filled not only with water but with children who woke scared in the middle of the night and slept-walked from the comfort of their own beds/cribs to climb in nice and cozy next to mom and dad..when we added the dog and cat to the mix Daddio was forced to cry "uncle" and the kids were told it was them or us...

in other words, Sir Daddio made a declaration that from here to forth no more rotten little fish outta water like sleep mates were to adorn our sleeping quarters...

A new (Queen sized, of course) bed was purchased and our offspring were offered a sleep mat on the floor to which they could flock should they be fearful of gargoyles or mean spirited ghosts and such in the middle of the night

(Evidence that the big guy does have a heart of gold)

And so forth and so on we've happily existed with sheets (two sets) one from some cheap retail chain and the other from IKEA... (a great buy at 20 bucks a set).

For 29 years of marriage that could and very well may be some kind of record.

Speaking of records, my poor kids suffered with cheap sheets too.

You do the Calculus... if given the choice between $125.00 Nike basketball shoes or a set of sheets... just sayin.

So this Christmas Daddio and I were gifted our very first ever really decent set of sheets.

I washed them, and was beyond delighted that there seemed to be an unusually large proportion of good quality material (the better to stretch my dear over the entire side of the mattress and make it's way down to fit generously yet securely around the bottom corners)...

Later when we climbed into bed Daddio and I had a moment to stretch down into the sheets and see if we could feel a difference...

We agreed the sheets felt thicker than we're used to... (and a bit colder)

They felt heavy, but a good heavy.

"They feel like hotel sheets!!!" Daddio exclaimed.

Minus the bed bugs...

(And that right there folks is how the other half lives...)

Queen Elzbieta, signing off... toodles

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