The difficult years..birth to present

I had a beautiful Mother's Day and I hope if you're a mom that you did too.

Buttercup and his Mrs came over on Saturday with a balloon, a mushy card, and cupcakes Mrs Buttercup had made.

(When I peeled back the foil and looked at them my (not so) "poker face" must have spoken volumes... WOW, these are very nice (incredibly plain) and unfrosted yellow cupcakes. WT-frick??? I leaned in to smell them in order to understand WHY my daughter in law would so proudly gift me with unfrosted cupcakes... now, the kid's no Ellie Mae Clampet by any means, but she was mysteriously very proud of the cupcakes...they were beautifully shaped, even plain they looked like they would taste great)

When I broke one in half to eat it I discovered the middle was filled with chocolate frosting...

Oh how I love a surprise, chocolate filled middle...

Mrs Buttercup also brought me a vase she made. A clear glass hurricane vase that was decorated with painted sticks that she picked up from the woods near her home.

She saw it on Pinterest and made one for her mom and I for Mother's Day.

I'm a sucker for vases, I'm a sucker for natural branches (of any size)...  I put a candle in it and then did what any good mother would do...I sent an email picture to Googie's phone letting her know that she'd been replaced as my number one girl.

Since it was Saturday that gave Googie one more shopping day to try and "one up" her sister in law..

Ohhhh how I do love me a good game of "who loves mother best?"

teee heeeeeee

Googie, Bear and Trouble came bearing awesome (over priced Hallmark) cards and gifts on Sunday.

Bear's card was hilarious...on the front it had a picture of a red-faced screaming baby and said "Mom, Thanks for raising me during my difficult years." on the inside "Birth to Present" ...

I cackled when I read that. How freakin true, every damn day we're mothers there is potential for a new challenge, the difficult years are often Birth to Present.. and seriously, who ever said it would be easy?

I am convinced that mothering is what I was born to do and what a validation to have three kids (plus two bonus kids) who tell you by words and deeds that they think you did it right.

Better than all the tea in China I tell ya.


PS... I'd better gush and brag and tell you that Googie and Bear bought me a pedicure for Mum's day. Trouble got me a card (JUST FROM HIM..WOW-ZA) and he and Googie got me some neat Elvis memorabilia, a dazzling spawk-ley copper diamond dusted bracelet (ohh she does know bracelets make my heart spaw-kle and sing songs of utter spaw-kley-ness). Googie also got me a small bird that sits on it's butt with it's little spindly stick legs and feet sticking straight forward, I put it on my windowsill and smile every time I see it.

PSS.. the real crack up here is that they didn't have to do a damn thing for me and I'd still know they love me and I know they appreciate me...even when I'm not helping them through the "difficult years"and their lives are hunky-dory and they don't need me for jack they still love ME and appreciate ME... they don't have to spend one red cent for me to know how loved I am.

I appreciate the things they do for me, really I do, but I must say that as long as they're happy and healthy and living a good life...that's all this mother needs to have a happy mother's day..it really is as simple as that.

(that said, you should SEE my bracelet, it's divine)

Blake Shelton - God Gave Me You (Official Video) FOR MARMIE..

Dear Marmie...

Country music star Blake Shelton wrote a beautiful song (It was written for his "woman", but I don't care, most of the words of this song can be said about how I feel about you).

(Just for the record I'm not a walkin heartache...not today anyway)

(you have to click on the corner "watch on YouTube" buttheads... In order to see/hear it, I would have re-done the whole post, but I had to go rub Daddio's feet, yeah I know it's Mother (tee-hee) Day and all, and he sure can be a mutha..especially today, he "helped" by doing the wash and shrunk my two (quite new) white shirts... I screamed so loud he thought I was being murdered, then I went nearly homicidal and hurt his feelings and he was sad, which made me have to apologize and kiss his rear for about a half hour..which had me thinking I really married a cleaver man, he shrinks my clothes and I end up worshipping him and making him a special breakfast, after the shabby way I treated him, I owed him that at least...whoa boy, yes I did, okay, sure, whatever you say...)

(GREAT, NOW THE VIDEO IS GONE, I'M GOING TO TRY AGAIN)

God gave me you Marmie...

Blessed beyond measure.

Here is a letter we sent you many, many moons ago (my spelling has gotten a bit better over the years)

The prettiest, most wonderful mother God ever gave to three (plus 3 bonus) lucky kids..

Marmie 

HAPPY MOTHER DAY MARMIE.... I LOVE YOU TO THE STARS AND BACK

Lawsuits and low cal sandwiches....

It's been a rough week being Bear's mom.

My darling baby boy has been promoted to manager of his department.

It's huge people...huge.

He's the boss...wow

He's also so full of himself that the buttons on his (dress) shirt are ready to pop...

"Yep, no more cleaning toilets for me" he boasts.

"No more scoopin poop for this guy"

His kill-joy mother (that would be me) responds..

"What the hell happens when your one, single, solitary employee calls off sick...?"

"You'll be pushing up those sleeves and goin back to humble beginnings..."

"Maybe you'd better invest in some dark brown dress shirts...."

(oh man, I do so entertain myself sometimes)

This is his first week as the BOSS and his first customer has threatened to take him to court.

And to make matters worse... his first lunch as a big ol Bossman wasn't up to snuff either.

The morning of his first day as the man in charge started out perfectly, Bear showered, I iron his clothes, rubbed his stressed out shoulders, ran up and down the stairs to gather his dress pants, made sure I coached him on how to properly answer the phone, spray starched and pressed an impressive seam in his stone colored Dockers, reminded him that outstanding customer service always involves a brown nose and some big (kissy) lips... (pucker up baby, u gonna be kissin some rear...)...

As this preparation was going on I was also busily doing my other (1950's homemaker wifely) duties.. getting Daddio "ready" for work.

As I lovingly prepared a lunch for the Lord and Master of our castle, his little chip off the ol block said (AND I QUOTE) "You don't need to make me a sandwich Ma, I can do it myself"

(well I know you can honey, but what is a helicopter mamma to do when her baby starts acting like a grown up and begins to take care of himself..?)

I already had the bread sitting on the counter, being the nice guy that I am I put it into a baggie to keep it fresh, and I hollered that very important titbit to Bear.

Later as he told the story about his first customer and her threat to sue him he thanked me for the delicious sandwich.

"Ohhh and MA, I really want to thank you for the bread, it was great. I was so hungry at lunch and those two plain slices of bread really hit the spot".

"Oh sheeeeee's sent me with that same exact sandwich" Daddio (the Peanut Gallery ring leader) piped up and shared.

"No, your sandwich wasn't plain bread, you had a booger on your's".... his Stepford wife replied.

Passive aggressiveness at it's absolute finest folks.

Most days I really love this job...tee-hee

Kitten Love....

You may have heard the story about Googie and her kitty. I've probably told it lots of times (cut me some slack... I'm in my really, really, really, super late forties, and people that old forget lots of things they say and write, so bear with me, k?).

When Googie was a wee tot (about 4 or so) she began to beg Daddio and I for a kitten.

Daddio is not really fond of cats, and he and The Sweet Prince Buttercup are sometimes allergic to them as well so that was always the debate closer...

"Sorry kid, no cat".

"You can get a cat when you grow up and live in your own house"

"But Daaaaa-deeeeee, I want a kitty when I'm still a little girl" she begged, her small dimpled hands clasped prayer style.

"Please Daaaaaa-deeee, Please?"

"Don't make me wait till I'm a big girl Daaaa-deeee, please, please, please don't make me wait that long for a kitty, Daddy please don't"

Alrighty then...

A week or two after that last conversation, Daddio,

(totally securing his position as a for-ever -and- ever hero in his five year old daughter's eyes)

 was finally worn to a mere pile of mush by Googie's begging and pleading...

 he caved and got the kid a cat.

A kitten actually, a beautiful, gentle souled creature, hand chosen by Daddio and who captured Googie's heart before she was even picked up out of the box he brought her home in.

Googie delighted in caring for her new baby and was rewarded by a fierce loyalty.

The kitty loved Googie more than anyone.

As Googie grew older and was away from home more the kitty mostly took it in stride and would only occasionally get angry and bite Googie's toes as she slept, a reminder, should she ever forget, that she had a bed mate who loved her dearly.

Destiny, lovin mothering, and some good cat genes have allowed Googie's kitty to live a looooong life

She turned a whoppin 20 years old the other day.

Hailey didn't move with Googie when she and Trouble married. Cats, especially old cats do better staying in a familiar environment and the old girl loves to spend hours laying on Googie's windowsil watching the neighbors (now that's a pastime....).

I feed her and water her and pat her old bony back, she gotten quite frail lately so I don't pick her up much anymore.

The old kitty still and for-ever-more loves best a special visitor who gathers her up for a cuddle and never, ever lets her forget how loved and precious she is.

Happy Birthday Hailey... (and thank you so much for being the best kitten ever and my best girl's best girl)

Hailey turns the big 2-0

PS... Googie's superhero Daddy is celebrating a birthday today.. he's a bit past 20. Wish him a good one if you are so inclined. 

xoxo

Ellen Reads '50 Shades of Grey'

Ohh Ellen.....

Ellen was asked to read and review 50 Shades of Grey (all the rage amongst middle aged women)

After watching this, I'm caught between "oh hell no" and "what the frick?"...

How bout you..? Will this book make your summer reading list?

A Song for Mom - Mother's Day Symphony (Official)......

A week from now, on the official Mother's Day (Hallmark) holiday you'll probably be so busy chillaxin on the davenport with your feet up in the air eating Godiva chocolates by the fist full, thumbing through the latest Cosmo (or maybe in your bed reading Fifty Shades of Grey....tee-hee) that you'll forget to stop by.. in case you do forget I'm posting this early. It's something every mother everywhere can relate to.

( I've survived all that crap, just listening to it drove a {{{shiver}}}} up my spine...)

(A special "thanks" to my step dad GG for sending it to me)







Happy Mother's Day...!!!!

xoxo

At least for today....

"Mom, I hate school"

"If getting a college degree was easy, everyone would have one"

"I'm quitting Mom. None of my friends go and they all make more money than I do"

"I'm going to be going to school for the next 10 years"

"Isn't that a bit of an exaggeration?"

"I'm not going to pass Biology. The teacher was as dumb as a rock, the grades should have been posted days ago. I'm going to write her an email telling her just what I think of her. She was the worst teacher I've ever had"

"You may want to wait until she posts your grade."

"I wouldn't burn any bridges if I were you"

"What if you have to take another of her classes?"

"I'm quitting school, remember"

"I'll be eighty before I graduate...too old to work, what will be the point.?

"Isn't that a bit of an exaggeration?"

"I have too many more classes to take, this is never, ever going to end, and I'm going to fail Biology. If the grades ever get posted. As soon as she posts my grade she's getting an email from me telling her what kind of rotten teacher she is"

"Don't send anything threatening, I don't want the cops on our doorstep"

"I hate school Mom, I've always hated school"

"Yeah, I know, that's why you're becoming a teacher"

"I'm quitting school Mom, quitting, I'll work full time and make more than a teacher makes anyway. All that schooling. Like 47 years and I'll only make around $25 grand a year, I can make that as a porter"

"I think you'll make a bit more than that son. People with college degrees always make more than those without"

"Steve Jobs quit college"

"Mark Zuckerberg was a dropout,  and you can see where those two went"

"Other than quitting school, do you have some big ideas floating around in your head that could potentially make you a millionaire?"

"You do anything you put your mind to kid,  you doubt yourself too much"

"Quit the pep talk Mom"

"I'm quitting school"

You can see dear readers why I've been absent lately. I can't come home and when I do I've been hiding out.

Each and every time Bear sees me we have the conversation (or some really close variation of the same conversation) above.

He's quitting school.

His Biology grade finally came in. (That lazy no good fer nuttin crummy azz teaching "impostor" finally posted the grades).

And...!!!!

He passed.

Thank God, he passed.

Poo poo pee doooooo.....

He scheduled his next semester's classes...which means that toooo-day, he is not quitting.

We've (yes, I'm in this too) still got about ohhh maybe 102 semesters to go until he graduates.

And becomes an underpaid teacher who hates school and kids and his life, or not.....

Life with an oscillating pessimist,

 .....tiring.