Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Strong enough to allow weakness....

I'm down to one female lovable in my (currently) tiny class.

She is drawn to me like a moth to flame.

You know how girls like to flock, gaggle and herd.

And seeing as I am (currently) the only female staff in my tiny class...I'm on board with this gaggle herding"flockship"

She waits for me to sit with her before she begins her lunch.

If I forget or get sidetracked I can usually find her sitting with her food, untouched, and getting cold.

She's an interesting girl... and quite mature for her age.

The couple of male loveables in class try all kinds of shenanigans to gather her notice...

They usually get a grimace, a scowl and an eye roll..

but hey.... it's a notice, right?

She walked with me yesterday to help me to carry some things out to my car.

Before we walked back in she started asking for help in warding off the boys unwanted and very immature attention.

"I'm gonna blow" she said "if they don't stop"...

We at Thug High School don't like hearing threats of "plosions" be they im or ex

especially from people who have "blown" in the past.

Often their implosions/explosions are what have led them to be students at Thug High...

This young girl is mature beyond her years, she doesn't act like any 15 yr old I've ever met before.

I tell her often that if we were classmates we'd surely be best buds.

I like her.

It's clear as day that she's is waging a war within herself to recognize her worth.

And fighting a battle to show others her value as well.

I can see a soul deep sadness, that so far, she hasn't offered up in our friendship.

I like to dig deep into a friendship and see truth.

I know from past discussions that part of her truth is that she is attached to a young boy who lives in her home, she knows some day (very soon) he is going to be leaving her.

She's given this kid her everything,

and then some.

She wants to be certain that he won't "forget" her...

I try with all my might to tell her how important she has been to his life and that even if he doesn't remember "her" he will remember (on some level) that he has been loved.

This boy is three years old.

He is the son of her on again/off again boyfriend.

As of this writing he is off again.

And not even in her home... he's off sowing his wild oats, while she and her family care for the tot.

The little boy's mom has not, since his birth, been in his life.

Even though my young friend doesn't admit it, I can tell she hopes her love and care of the boy will be enough to keep his dad interested...

I know better..

while she is special (so very special), there are lots more like her willing to do the same and even more of whatever it takes to try keep a guy.

Even a not so Mr Wonderful guy.

I tell her one of my favorite quotes from Dr Laura Schlessinger "a good one will be willing to swim through shark infested waters to bring you a lemonade"...  that should be your striving point.."

"I sincerely don't think this guy is good enough for you." I add.

We talk about the chances that this baby will be moving on with his dad (and probably on to another girl with a big heart)...

It will happen... just a matter of time.

We touch on this again while outside yesterday.

On our way back into the building she tells me that she doesn't cry over this or anything else.

"Never?" I ask.

"We may need to take a field trip to the Hallmark store" I suggest.

"I don't think that's healthy, we all have to have a good leak every now and then" I say, hoping to make her laugh.

"No" she says "crying is a sign of weakness."

"I don't do weak."

I try so hard to pull some wise words to help with the obvious deep hurt.

"I saw a neat sign on Pinterest" I tell her.

" Do you believe in God..have faith?" I ask her

"Of course" she says "very much."

The sign on Pinterest said "Faith in God includes faith in His timing"....

She spun around quickly so I couldn't see her face...

seems her strength was dripping from her eyes and running down her cheeks.

I gathered her into a hug, happy to see her heavy weakness leave her body.

It was a good start.

Today, I plan to give her a printed copy of the faith sign and also another one of my other favorites

Thank you for listening.


  1. You made me all weepy. Thank goodness she has you.

  2. Thanks Jessi for your comment and for reading... xoxoxo

  3. You are amazing, Miss Beth. I don't think you even realize how many of our youth leave feeling like they had a loving mother in their corner. You make so many kids that have never had that feel so special.

  4. the quote at the bottom was another sign for me as I contemplate some life changes. Thank you!!

  5. Thank you darling Carly Sue... xoxoxox

    Together, in the good fight.

  6. Anonymous... I wish you strength. xoxo


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